philadelphia

i remember the nights we'd listen to wilco the ghost is born cd,  get high and make love.  after a late night out from shared glasses of sake from the dumpling place on university thats no longer there.  its been years since i've seen you. but somehow there still seems to be this memory that makes me smile,  as i wonder how phillys treating you.  

there are times when i really feel universally connected with everything. absolute happiness and appreciation for the moment, in the moment.  i say thank you in my mind over and over again. thanking whatever force at work that grants me the honor of bringing this feeling to me or more kindly, thanking myself for allowing it.  giving it all up in order to get it all.  its funny how things work sometimes. you wrestle with letting go of anything and it ricochets back at you with more intensity than ever.  with everything, let go of money, let go of media, let go of people, let go of security, and then i promise you will find yourself sitting in the best position possible.  one of internal strength. no external reinforcement necessary to solidify how great you are.  

you feel your own greatness. 

"bull farting" how awesome is this sculpture

i was on a rooftop in brooklyn, 1 in the morning.  i saw the five bridges and watched the lights flash in manhattan and you were saying something....    holy shit! i was in my favorite song!

the next night p and i went to an all girls roller derby, thanks to andy   

ok. i'm so not into what the next best things are. i don't care like i don't care whether i have TV or not and since the digital explosion its totally absent from my life and that is good. well, the dead weather, it makes me feel a little bit like the way i felt first listening to sonic youth in my childhood bedroom. wet, gushy and inspired. they are great. and i'm not arguing with you about it. pure creativity is not meant to be pretty. it should be dirty and raw

hhhhhip hop

sometimes i get dressed in my sluttiest little number and
dance for hours alone in my dark bedroom to this...
oooooooh yeah and you know its the truth

love the shit out of you

so i met this guy soliel i'm not sure how to say his name, its isreali. i screw it up at every opportunity and to his face. soleil, shouele, something with an S and an L and a little screwy 'ule at the end.

well anyway, he says to me, how old are you? because you act really young. i thought to myself, i am the most bizarre person. i thought, i act young because everything is a new experience to me. not intentionally but accidentally. like i forget to remember how things are so the experience is always my first introduction to it. thats why i'll be 14 when i'm 68. its my numeralical-clizmic number. it's my "i'll never grow the fuck up, i'll never get a real job, i'll never do what i'm told, i'll always have dessert before dinner, i'll always find new ways to loiter in the middle of the street, i'll always believe that too much of a good thing is wonderful" number.

to my loving refrigerator

i have this new song for midibear, i wish you could hear it.
it goes something like this:
"you small guy but you've got big heart
you small guy but you've got big heart
midibear midibear i mean be fo' real
you small guy but you've got big heart"
(with asian inflection)
i sing it to him all the time, actually i think this song will be his new complete name.
that's it, inspirational moment, i'm having a party to inaugurate midibear's new name and it's a song!
i'll let the vet know so when they confirm an appt., they'll have to say his full name or else i'll refuse to acknowlegdge him being clientele.

With love, always and in all ways.

the sun and the soil

i fall in love so many times in one day. the person that smiles at me when i pass them, a dog lapping water on a hot day, when i'm on the phone and i can sense an inner smile on the other end, holding your mail while fumbling for the keys, missing the last step while going downstairs to the chinese restaurant, taking a picture of your little feet, all of this kills me and i fall in love over and over and over again.

last night was no exception

do you love midibear

its the way i feel its what i want

its the way i feel its what i want

roll down the window

when i see this picture it makes me want to cry. one winter day as i was leaving upstate he was staring up at me through the car window. best buddy going far far away..no more snowy hikes, no more side lap bacon scrapes, no more bed snuggling. that's all.  like somethings; just run their course and you know inherently when its time to pick up and walk away

so ridiculously funny, laugh

smile

(631) 878-5867

i went skydiving with robby on sunday. it was the most exhilarating experience of my life and for about 15 seconds after having thought i lost my mind a wave of absolute clarity came over me 30,ooo feet in the air.  we are supposed to experience tremendous joy. thats all.  

haaaaaaaaaaaaahaaaaaaaaaaaaa

random

i heard a bird tweet away last night outside my window and it brought me to tears

watching animals and water brings me to the happiest place in my mind

i have done some terrible things in my past and everyday i'm trying to forgive myself 

when i see people from then, its an impossible feat to start fresh in their minds so i've learned to let it go

i get really sad when i think of some great friendships i have lost

i own 3 jeans/4 t-shirts/3 towels and 28 pairs of sneakers

i am new

banksy

did i happen to mention my new fascination with 

BANKSY (the uk graf artist). he is so incredible that there

needs to be a new word to describe how his work makes

me feel

(click on title to see his work)

lower east side

at a rooftop film festiVAL 

i love saying it with an emphasis on VAL it makes me laugh.

and tomorrow is going to be a glorious day in traffic court

my personal serenade before bedtime

there are some people you meet in life that ring true to your core and in turn helps reflect your own vulnerability. i hope everyone experiences it because the ego separates one from all that is genuine.

robby once told me that all musicians/artists/writers/amazing creators don't have the desire for fame or notoriety. they create for the sheer joy and the most talented people remain there, in their bedroom, silent, perhaps misunderstood, internally happy and totally content.  

cherry blossoms i love you

joe shanghai soup dumplings the best in the world

ahhhhhh...and on sunday

overdosed on indie

yeah yeah yeahs
cymbals eat guitars
the walkmen

frog, i'm glad to have a brave friend like you

lose yourself in this little place for awhile

cell phone

the sad suitcase